Real Beauty
Tess Rosenbush (1974-2021)
you. are your own standard of beauty.
— mirror work, nayyirah waheed
In Nayyirah Waheed’s poem the word ‘standard’ implies measurement or comparison. This is a poem, so a literal translation is somewhat unhelpful. But in a world that relentlessly insists on standardising beauty for women, I think it’s worth exploring the notions of beauty that we consciously or unconsciously calibrate ourselves around.
When we look closely in the mirror, what are the standards of beauty that define what we see?
Do we compare ourselves to the standardised and commodified cultural norms of beauty that relentlessly target women and girls and if so, do we measure up or fall short? Do we dive deeper into the bottomless well of our own inner beauty where incomparable charisma is found? Do we embody the knowing that true beauty is a state of being and is therefore both measureless and ageless?
The practical wisdom of Ayurveda offers us three standards – or pillars – of beauty that generously contain myriad definitions of both worldly and eternal beauty. And in doing so they reflect back to us a vision of beauty that is simultaneously human and holy.
The three beauty pillars according to Ayurveda:
1. Roopam is outer beauty. This quality of beauty is personified by a radiant complexion and healthy hair, and it’s also the beauty that surrounds us in our daily life such as a dreamy sunset or an exquisitely designed building.
2. Gunam is inner beauty. This quality of beauty is personified by a luminous glow that shines from the inside out – it’s that felt quality of magnetic energy that radiates from a loving heart and discerning mind.
3. Vayastyag is lasting beauty. This quality of beauty is personified when we look and/or feel younger than our chronological age physically, psychologically, and/or socially.
Real beauty, then, is a nourished body, warm heart, and buoyant soul.
Ayurvedic practitioner, Tiziana Boccaletti, notes that beauty is closely aligned with the term beatitude and the eastern concept of bliss. Beauty is when your cellular matrix is bathed in the knowing of your Divine Nature and this happiness radiates from the inside out to inspire others. Beauty within and beauty without.
When we look in the mirror, may bliss be the standard of beauty we hold ourselves to.
Tat tvam asi. You are That.
Note: The beautiful woman in the photo is Tess Rosenbush (1974-2021). Tess was an Ayurvedic and Tibetan Medicine practitioner. I met Tess in 2018 when she was running the Samata Clinic and Amrita Kitchen in Goa, India. She had an outer radiance and heart-connected presence that I can feel even now as I think of her. She is no longer with us, but the eternal beauty of her soul is still lighting up the world. What I feel when I look at this image of Tess is real beauty. Maybe you do too.